New Worlds found through a date.

Full disclosure here. I have been on very few dates in my life. Today, meeting with a total stranger for a walk in the woods I found myself in places I've never been before.

Pleasantly, meeting this person, I did not lose my grounding. Despite it being under the context of a date. Despite being in the area I grew up in. Despite having a bunch of stressors and pain. When I noticed myself floating into pain I pulled out my salts. The scented salts I am using for a Pavlovian response. I stayed within.

Remarkably, I found myself in many different worlds, most of which I rarely go to. I saw myself as a cissexual girl who's only real problem in life is chronic pain. I saw myself as a powerful transsexual girl who has overcome and flourished. As just another person hoping to find connection with another. There was much simplicity in these. Darkness, sads, oversharing, were not welcome today.

As our walk ended I began to feel high. Saturation turned way up. Warmth from every element of life shining in. Then I remembered I had taken 0.25 mL of a THC tincture. Iknow Iknow, but normally that little quantity does not effect me so.

I found myself wanting physical contact too. Yet I have no idea why or where it came from. I feel like I used to really want to know WHY. Now, I feel strong enough to express my intentions, desires, hopes, and allow it to flow. I hope I can flow.